create

Create

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For as long as I can remember I have loved creating.  I’m sure it started at a young age–coloring, play-doh, and basic arts and crafts.  We had several babysitters growing up who instilled a sense of creative wonder in us as well–I can remember making sock puppets, creating intricate games, and activities that didn’t always end up the way they were planned (sorry about breaking that piece off of the chandelier!).

As I have grown up, my creativity has stayed consistent.  Sometimes I don’t capitalize on it, or admit it (Shelly will be the first to tell you that).  I love creating and being artistic.  Crafting is a part of my blood.  Several, several years ago I opened an Etsy site.  Eventually it became too much and I stopped making sales.  I have had a Facebook page that has continued (though not updated) as well.  Both have become ghost towns.  That is until today.  I’ve found such joy in being able to create new pieces for my own home, I have more than I need.  So I want to create as a way for self-care, and making a little money on the side is not bad either.  So I spent time today figuring out what areas I wanted to concentrate on, taking pictures, pricing pieces, and updating my Facebook Page and Etsy site.  I even updated my logos.

I’d love your support if you are interested.  All items currently are custom orders.  But I am happy to work with you to find something that fits your needs and budget.  You can check out my Etsy here and my Facebook page here.

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I Find Her in the Words

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One month to go. Less than really. And it doesn’t seem any more real than it did a year ago. There’s this strange time between 2/22 and 3/18 that will always leave me in a haze of wonderment.

I talked to one of my many “sisters” today. She brings much solace to my soul through her insight, mystical soul, and youngest camaraderie. Her words today soothed me, enlivened the song in my heart, and reminded me to keep watch.

No one will understand exactly what my grief is like. No one will understand perfectly my journey and purpose on this earth. But several know pieces. And I am thankful for how those pieces and those people are bound together. So when I feel sad or lost or without hope or direction I still have places to turn.

The words of others are just amplifying her words. They are bringing new insight, shedding new light, and constant reminders of her presence and being in the here and now. Today I am thankful for the thin places where I can hear her, where I can feel her, where I know she is reaching out fully of laughter and grace.

I am thankful for the memories other people share so I can continue getting to know her. So that when I am too tired to grasp on to the fragments of her there are still pages flooding in that keep her story in print.

I can remember the joy and wonder she had 30 years ago of being a mom again and welcoming you into this world. May this year and new decade be filled with many blessings and opportunities.

Blessings and opportunities. These are things I can create.

Every Intention

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I have had every intention of writing a post the last few days. I’ve had several different thoughts and paths, it hasn’t been a lack of subject. But I have stayed true to my commitment. I’ve been lazy and apathetic. And, in some ways, shows me my own humanity. There is a lack of perfection. There is a lack of always being or doing right.

So I wrote now. I make the change now.

Music has been a constant theme of my last week. Singer/songwriter, folk, Americana, indie: songs I’ve grown up on, and songs that hold family importance, and songs that defined my college experience at school and in the summers. Music has been, is, and always will be a constant thread for me.

It soothes me, it grounds me, it pushes me to be better and to create. I feel it in my blood and in my bones and at the very core of me. It helps me be me.

Poetry

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I told myself today that I was going to get a lot done. Cleaning, shopping, taking things to Good Will, taking recycle. And I told myself I was going to write a poem for my blog.

The first stuff happened. And then I went to lunch with some of my favorite people. And then I got distracted by a fundraising campaign (check it out here: http://www.gofundme.com/bennettgiveback). And I didn’t create a poem. Maybe tomorrow.

I am thankful for goals and the ways I’ve been pushing myself physically and spiritually. But sometimes we need to allow ourselves to rest, to not always take great strides toward the end in sight. Sometimes we just need to breathe.

Here’s to an evening of breathing and a day of creating tomorrow.

Roll Call

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My word for 2018 is “create”.  I haven’t been doing as much of it as I want but here are somethings I have completed or are in the works:

  • Baby Onesies–completed and gifted
  • “welcome” door hanging–completed and hung
  • Mix CDs–completed and gifted
  • Mug Christmas gifts–completed and belatedly gifted
  • Tshirt quilt–in process
  • Boho bag–in process
  • Collage Birthday card–completed and sent
  • Wrap Pants–in process (for years now)
  • Tag Blankets–in thought
  • Falkor Plush “teddy bear”–in thought

It doesn’t seem like a lot, but at the same time it seems like a ton!  Here’s to holding myself accountable and continuing to create.  Crafty creations are just one piece of my “create” resolution.

What I’ve Learned

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Yesterday I had the opportunity to get together with a community of women, most whom I’d never met prior, and celebrate “Women’s Christmas”. If you are interested you can learn more here. It was a wonderful two hours of getting to know one another, openly sharing or experiences and our lives, being vulnerable, laughing, almost crying, and being present.

I am extremely thankful that my friend Anne asked me to be a part of this mini retreat. I am thankful for the five other women who came as well. Their stories are not the same of mine, but we all had glimpses of similarities. It was a comforting reminder that we don’t walk alone and we are not the only ones who walk our path of sorts.

But here’s what I learned:

  1. There are women out there, like me, who dream. And sometimes we have to be reminded to do this. And sometimes we have to intentionally make space for this. It is a wonderful feeling to have others who encourage us, ask us the deep questions, and remind us that rest is important.
  2. I have a deep need for community. This is a root of my being, surrounding myself with others (not always like-minded but definitely open-minded) who appreciate questioning and conversation and study time.
  3. I’m a life-long learner, especially in the areas of faith and spirituality. It excites me, and intrigued me, and helps me better frame and understand the world around me.
  4. As my chosen word for the year is “create,” I need to make new pockets of community for myself. Book studies, crafting circles, discussion groups, friends of friends, acquaintances and yes–even strangers. My soul craves community in small and large ways. And it is high time I feed that part of me.

I am thankful for being pulled out of my shell last night, for being on the verge of tears at points as stories were told and blessings were shared but still feeling comfortable and supported in that space.

And so I leave you with this blessing by Jan Richardson: