When You Feel It

Lent: Day 19?

I had the opportunity to be a part of a fellowship program in 2013. It’s one of the things in my life that I am most thankful for—it has helped me grow by leaps and bounds during that year but also every year since. Thanks to J, T, and M for their presence in that growth. But this fellowship has brought many wonderful people into my life (not just in my fellowship year). My two closest friends from that 2013 group, though, ironically have the same first name and both of them spelled non-traditionally.

My friend S is someone who is very different from me. If we had met at any other point in life I’m not sure that we would be as close. I know we would not have run in the same circles in high school or college—she’s way too cool for me. But at these stages in our adults lives (admittedly she’s older than me, as are most of my closest friends) we connect deeply. I can’t tell you what it is, but something about her makes me feel seen and heard and want to share my story in the most vulnerable of ways. I knew she was a kindred spirit early in our meeting of one another when we found ourselves paired for an activity and we were laughing LOUDLY at every little part of our interaction. I don’t remember the task at hand or what was said. But I sure as hell remember that laughter: that “belly hurts” you’re laughing so hard, that “I can’t breathe” kind of laughter, that “my humor and my joy is matched in this moment” type of experience. And this was the first of many many moments like this.

She makes me laugh a lot. She has my back. She wants the best for me. We’ve shared deep pieces of our lives that few people know, we operate from a place that is completely judgement free (and there are few people in this world I feel truly allow me to operate this way), we see each other on this really unique level. In the last 6 months (maybe 12?) we’ve reconnected and it has made life so wonderful. She has seen me through ridiculous dating stories. I’ve supported her through doing what is best for her own heart. She’s tried to set me up with men who are WAY TOO THIRSTY (or just too thirsty for me).

I am so thankful for the joy and richness she brings to my life. It’s a gift beyond words. And I’m eternally and continually grateful for her continued support and rallying behind me. Youdda best, S. I love you.