I am Woman….

You may know the song.  But after last weekend, I’d rather end that opening title with ” hear me squeal like Richard Simmons”.  Just some Richard Simmons

We had our first Women’s Retreat last weekend, our church hasn’t had one for maybe ten or so years?  It’s hard to say because they haven’t had one since I have been working here (and I start my 8th year in October!).  I was a little nervous going into the weekend, you never know when you get together a new group of people exactly how they will interact and get along.  But I was blown away by the openness, grace, laughter, and support that came out of the weekend.

I organized the event, but in order to give me the opportunity to get as much as other participants from the retreat, we opted for an outside facilitator.  It was easy for me to figure out who I wanted to lead us.  My friend Anne , is a certified retreat leader.  I have attended many retreats that she used to lead for youth and knew how refreshing it would be to have her in the space, guiding us.  She and I met, talked about what I hoped for participants, and came up with a loose framework.  She sent me the outlines along the way to make sure she was on the right path, but admittedly, I was tentative in reading them, not wanting to “ruin” my own experience.

She created wonderful opportunities for us as we delved into the landscapes of our lives and how they are woven together.  There was time for self-reflection (something I don’t do enough), paired sharing, and group discussion.  There was time for creativity, time for laughter, movie views, singing (wow, these ladies have amazing voices), and yes even time to Sweat to the Oldies. 🙂

I didn’t know everyone on this retreat well.  But I came away with a deeper sense of each one of them.  There is a kindredness that this time together created among us, that was surely something I didn’t anticipate.  But I am so thankful for it.  I can only hope that the other ladies got as much from the weekend as I did.  I am hopeful that it becomes an annual tradition because it is something I am already looking forward to for next year.

For me there is strength found in connections.  But more than that, there is an unexplained strength in women coming together as a group.  We find solace, support, identification, and listening in a way not found by any other group.  And I covet this time, in a world that so often tears people apart, leaves them alone, tells us we are not good enough.

As I drove to work this morning, and this post was spinning around in my head, I was listening to one of my favorite Sara Bareilles songs.  It’s from the musical, Waitress.  Some of the words really spoke to me:

She’s imperfect, but she tries
She is good, but she lies
She is hard on herself
She is broken and won’t ask for help
She is messy, but she’s kind
She is lonely most of the time
She is all of this mixed up and baked in a beautiful pie
She is gone, but she used to be mine.

Aren’t we all a few of those things?  Haven’t we all felt that way, at some point?  I heard stories this weekend of failure, hurt, disappointment, struggle, and sadness.  But what I learned was those were only pieces of the stories–because in failure, there was success; in hurt, their was healing; in disappointment, there was pride; in struggle, there was perseverance; and in sadness, there was joy.  Maybe not immediately, maybe not always, but it was there.  And there is now this group of women that can remind us to keep our head up.  We are women, hear us ROAR.

Quotes About Strength In Love Faith  Quotes About Strength And Love Quotes Courage Of A Woman

What I’ve Learned

Yesterday I had the opportunity to get together with a community of women, most whom I’d never met prior, and celebrate “Women’s Christmas”. If you are interested you can learn more here. It was a wonderful two hours of getting to know one another, openly sharing or experiences and our lives, being vulnerable, laughing, almost crying, and being present.

I am extremely thankful that my friend Anne asked me to be a part of this mini retreat. I am thankful for the five other women who came as well. Their stories are not the same of mine, but we all had glimpses of similarities. It was a comforting reminder that we don’t walk alone and we are not the only ones who walk our path of sorts.

But here’s what I learned:

  1. There are women out there, like me, who dream. And sometimes we have to be reminded to do this. And sometimes we have to intentionally make space for this. It is a wonderful feeling to have others who encourage us, ask us the deep questions, and remind us that rest is important.
  2. I have a deep need for community. This is a root of my being, surrounding myself with others (not always like-minded but definitely open-minded) who appreciate questioning and conversation and study time.
  3. I’m a life-long learner, especially in the areas of faith and spirituality. It excites me, and intrigued me, and helps me better frame and understand the world around me.
  4. As my chosen word for the year is “create,” I need to make new pockets of community for myself. Book studies, crafting circles, discussion groups, friends of friends, acquaintances and yes–even strangers. My soul craves community in small and large ways. And it is high time I feed that part of me.

I am thankful for being pulled out of my shell last night, for being on the verge of tears at points as stories were told and blessings were shared but still feeling comfortable and supported in that space.

And so I leave you with this blessing by Jan Richardson: